Valentines Day is around the corner. Now, this can go at least four ways:
1) You have a significant other and get really excited.
2) You have a significant other and couldn't care less.
3) You're single and the thought of V-day makes you twitch with resentment that you don't have someone to spend it with.
4) You're single and you don't really care. You realize that you have more important things to do than worry about not having a significant other, and you are perfectly okay with it.
I like to think that at this stage in my life I am at the 4th option. I recently went through a breakup, and it was hard on me for a while. The past few weeks have been the first real days in which I have found pure joy in being single again. It helps that I am insanely busy right now. I have a pile of laundry in my room that is exploding, my bathroom is a mess, my car looks like a tornado hit it, and I have a lot of school work I need to focus on... I feel like this is more important than boys at the moment.
I read something on Pinterest the other day that really got me thinking. It said "You only get 10 years to be in your twenties". That hit me! I am on the brink of turning 21, so right at the beginning of my twenties. I am at that age when friends start getting engaged, planning weddings, and thinking of their future with another person. Last semester, 7 girls in my sorority alone got engaged.
I think it's silly the amount of pressure our society puts on people in their 20's. Our society has a formula they want us all to fit in: school for 13 years, go to a good college, graduate, either go straight to grad school or get married and get a job. And if we don't get married right off the bat, we're supposed to spend the rest of our 20's devoted to finding Mr. or Mrs. Right. Now I'm not saying that looking for love is a bad thing, but maybe desperately yearning for it to the point where nothing else is satisfying, is. Life is too short not see the happiness in everyday.
"You only get 10 years to be in your twenties"
It's crazy for me to think of how much my life has changed in the last 10 years. 10 years ago I was in 5th grade. 10 years ago I had never been kissed, never been depressed, and never had my heart broken. 10 years ago I had never experienced the true love of God, thought about college, known what I wanted to do with my future. 10 years ago I wanted to be a fashion designer, an interior designer, or a famous singer like Britney Spears by the time I reached the ago of 13 (this is before she went cray cray). Now I want to be a youth minister, and maybe eventually a counselor, bringing teenagers and preteens the love of Christ.
But in the past 10 years I have shed many tears, laughed so hard I didn't even know it was possible, and overcame many milestones. In the past 10 years I have created bonds that are going to last a lifetime, ended ones that are unhealthy for me, and have been learning to live for God on a daily basis, even though there are many days when I forget to give him the glory. In the past 10 years I have overcome illness, emotional wounds, and gotten to know the person God is creating in me a little better each day.
"You only get 10 years to be in your twenties"
In a few short weeks I will be 21. In the U.S. this is a monumental age. Not only is it when you can legally buy and consume alcohol, it is also when you are officially recognized as an adult. Technically you are at 18, but there is just something about being 21.
My mom told me when I was growing up to never settle. To enjoy my twenties. To not be determined to be wed by a certain age. She had a good friend that did this, and that ended very badly. It also helps that my mom was in her late twenties when she tied the knot.
So I am coming back to a realization that I've had before, but am in need of again: that it is okay for me to be single. God wants me to be single right now. I have a feeling that he has some work for me to do, and I am excited to see what that is. And I am going to enjoy my twenties. Hopefully God will put someone in my life in the next 10 years or so, but what's the hurry? I do not need to have my "ring by spring" to be content. And I think that God wants me to be single right now, so I can do whatever he wants for me to do. Right now I can focus on getting closer to God, and enjoying the many aspects of singleness.
"I serve the Author of Time, who is NOT subject to time, but I am subject to Him. He has the ability to STOP, FAST FORWARD, PAUSE, or REWIND at any given time…"
"You only get 10 years to be in your twenties"
It's crazy for me to think of how much has happened in the past 10 years. Sometimes it seems like such a short time, and sometimes it feels really long... but it all just makes me really excited for the next 10. I have no idea what is going to happen. I have no idea what joys I may have, and what the hardships are that will accompany it. But I know that God will be right there by my side.
In a society that puts so much emphasis on a structure of how life is supposed to go, I am going to choose to let God have the reigns. If he wants me to go to grad school, that is in his hands. If he wants me to get married in my 20's, he will put someone in my life. It is all up to him.
Something I often talk about with friends is life after college. It's scary because for the first time in your life you don't have a set structure. Everything that happens after graduation for the majority of college graduates is an unknown land. Where am I going to live? Where am I going to work? Who am I going to marry? When am I going to get married? Will I get married? What will my kids be like? Will I be able to have kids? and many more. To be perfectly honest, it kind of freaks me out.
But God is in control.
This summer God was asking me if I trusted him. I told him I did, and I made some important changes to my life. Lately I have had that question pounding through my head. The answer is a daily reminder to give God control.
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